Richness Is An Important Factor In Helping People | Band 9 IELTS Essay Sample
The following essay question was asked on an IELTS test recently held in the UK. You can spend 40 minutes on this task. You have to write at least 250 words.
Richness is an important factor in helping people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Here is a band 9 essay sample on this topic. Need help with IELTS writing? Get your IELTS essays, letters and reports corrected by me.
Band 9 IELTS essay sample
Rich people earn more than enough to lead a comfortable life so that they can spend their disposable income on anything they like. For instance, they can use their excess wealth for the well-being of other people. Take a look around and you will see that the biggest philanthropists are all rich people. Today multi-billionaires in the US and other countries do more philanthropy than the governments of the world. In other words, being rich helps in helping others. Hence, I agree with the given argument to a certain extent.
Poor people, on the other hand, have to struggle hard to meet their own needs. When they don’t have enough money to meet their own needs they cannot donate money to help others. On the flip side, charity or philanthropy isn’t all about donating money. It also involves donating time and effort. Both rich and poor people can make a difference to the society. You don’t necessarily have to donate money to help people. If you can spare at least an hour a day you can help people in very many ways. If you are educated and have a few hours to spare a week, you can spend that time in teaching underprivileged kids. Those few hours will make a huge difference to their lives. And for doing that all that you need is a strong desire to help other people.
What this means is that although money plays a significant role in helping people it is not the only thing that matters. Charitable institutions also require people who can donate their time and goodwill. In other words, not being rich is no reason to stay out of philanthropy.
Looking at both sides of the argument, it doesn’t take a lot of effort to see that richness is not the only factor that determines a person’s ability to help others. It is important, but even if you are not rich you can help people in several other ways.
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Mam, I ADMIRE the essays you write and have ben your follower.
I have a question! In your introduction, you wrote that you agreed with the given argument. But, in the body paragraphs, you have explained that money is not the only factor and mostly referred to the other side of the argument. Also, while concluding your essay, you mentioned that richness is not the only factor and there are several other ways as well. Is it ok to do so? Because your position should be clear throughout the essay but, I feel that you have contradicted your opinion. Could you please help me?
Well, I just edited that statement. I changed it to ‘Hence, I agree with the given argument to a certain extent.’. You are right. Thanks for bringing this to my attention. The whole of your essay should support the opinion expressed in the introduction. This was on oversight on my part.
It is often argued that having more money is the key factor in helping others. This essay completely disagrees with this statement. This essay believes that helping mentality drives people to do charity and the fact that there are so many other ways to help people, followed by a reasoned conclusion.
Being rich does not mean that a person will help others. In other words, having a positive thought is a crucial factor in this kind of activities. There are so many rich people in many countries they never help people who are in the struggle even though they have an excess amount in their savings. Whereas, some people still come forward to help others from what they have despite their poverty. It is, therefore, pure mind and thought to decide to help people in need.
Another point to consider is that giving more money to people is not only the way to help others. To put it in other words, money is not only the solution for every need. However, people can aid others in several other ways such as a graduate can teach poor children for free or a person can work in charity as a volunteer to help people. Thus, there are so many other ways are there if we really have a desire to help others.
In conclusion, although people say that having more asset is the primary factor to help other people, I disagree with this view. Possessing a mind that ready to help others is the primary factor and apart from the money, plenty of other ways are there to help poor people.
This seems band 6.5 to me.
Nowadays the number of rich people is growing faster, it means that there are more opportunities than in the past. It is a good signal because even those people spend big amounts of money on luxury cars or houses, the have also extra money to help other people who are in a whole different situation. I strongly agree with the idea of using the money from those who have more to help those who have less, or nothing.
Helping poor people is not easy, the institutions or charities need huge amounts of resources to buy groceries, medical supplies, or even clothes. This stuff is expensive and in many cases it would not be possible without the help of donations. Moreover those donations are not limited only to rich people, anyone has the possibility to help others. Thus, it is important to encourage the society to spend less and give more.
Only in a special point I disagree with this idea and it is when the act of giving turns into a drawback for the people who receive. A clear example is what occurs when the poor people get used to receive all the time, and make no effort to break through thier situation because they are getting what they need for free. When this happens, it means that the supposed cure is becoming the illness.
In conclusion, I heavily believe that the people with more resources should use them to ease the lives of others who are facing hard times. But this action must be performed always aiming to solve the root cause of the people problems, to achieve finally permanent solutions and not only short-time containments.
This seems band 6 to me.