Some People Think That Hard Work Helps In Achieving Financial Success | Band 7 IELTS Essay Sample

Some people think that hard work helps in achieving financial success, while others believe that it is not the only thing that contributes to monetary achievements. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Here is a band 7 IELTS essay on this topic written by one of our students. Need help with IELTS writing? Get your IELTS essays, letters and reports corrected by me.

Band 7 IELTS essay sample

People have different opinions about what contributes to financial success/achievement. While some of them believe that the main factor contributing to an improvement in their monetary situation is their hard work, I do not agree with them. In my opinion, the increment in earnings depends on numerous factors.

It is true that there are several lines of evidence supporting the view that people can obtain more financial benefits by working hard. To be more specific, for ordinary workers, through this method, they can create better work performance, and thus earn higher salaries since in most companies, salaries are determined by performance/results. In addition, it is possible for entrepreneurs to earn more by devoting more time to their work, identifying and recruiting talent and focusing on delivering products or services that cater to the needs of the customer.

However, I agree with those who believe that several factors contribute to financial gain, and mere dedication cannot facilitate monetary success beyond a certain extent. For example, most people engaging in manual labour work really hard and yet they do not earn much. By contrast, those who have white collar jobs earn considerably higher salaries due to their mastery of professional knowledge and skills, and this can explain the view that the secret of monetary gain is a combination of other factors and hard work. In addition, there are also some extreme situations where some people have obtained massive wealth from their ancestors, and such monetary achievement is not related to working hard.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that the factors contributing to financial accomplishment are not restricted to individuals’ dedication, but vary from person to person, depending on their own situations.