Some People Believe That Success Is About Hard Work And Determination | Band 6.5 IELTS Essay Sample

Some people believe that success is about hard work and determination. Others think that success has connection with money and personal appearance. Discuss both of views. Give your opinion and some of your own experiences.

Here is a band 6.5 IELTS essay on this topic written by one of our students. Need help with IELTS writing? Get your IELTS essays, letters and reports corrected by me.

Band 6.5 IELTS essay sample

People have different views about factors leading to people’s achievements. While I agree that wealth and physical appearance are essential, I think that diligence and persistence are key factors that lead to constant success.

There are various reasons why people believe that a sense of fulfillment depends on material factors such as attractive looking and money. If people are superior to others in terms of wealth or appearance, raising their confidence significantly. It would be beneficial in their social life, resulting in a person gaining a sense of power. For instance, when a female singer or model is beautiful, gaining much attention from audiences due to greater opportunities to climb the social ladder. In addition, being born in an affluent family, people typically have a foundation to pursue their dream job or desirable education which allows them to have a secure job in the future.

Despite these arguments, I believe that if individuals achieve things without trying, they would feel useless due to the lack of a sense of purpose in life, resulting in suffering from depression-related diseases. Moreover, having determination and diligence would increase the chances of success as people become stronger after several trials and errors and hard work. If taken seriously, they may even become leaders or inventors soon. For instance, Thomas Edison, a well-known inventor, conducted countless experiments and failed thousands of times before inventing the bulb. 

In conclusion, although I acknowledge that money and personal appearance can lead to people’s success, I contend that the role of being hardworking and persistent is far more crucial individually and socially.

Manjusha Nambiar

Hi, I'm Manjusha. This is my blog where I give IELTS preparation tips.