Some Countries Encourage Teenagers To Have Part Time Job | Band 8 IELTS Essay Sample
Some countries encourage teenagers to have part time job and see it as a good thing while others disagree. Give your opinion and discuss both the views.
Here is a band 8 IELTS essay on this topic submitted by one of our students. Need help with IELTS writing? Get your writing samples corrected by me.
Band 8 IELTS essay sample
Several nations around the world support the idea of part time jobs for the teenagers as it is considered a wise and excellent way of personality development; however, others do not agree with the idea. In my opinion, youngsters should take up a part time job because it helps them to learn different aspects of life at a young age and also enhance their perspective.
On the one hand, some countries around the world consider part time job as an important way of learning whereby a teenager sees life in more complex ways and gains a sense of responsibility. Part time jobs help a teenager to feel independent and motivated to face future challenges by giving them firsthand experience in handling complex problems and situations at work. Moreover, it helps them understand the value of money. When teenagers get to manage their personal finances, they will also learn the importance of saving.
On the other hand, some countries do not consider part time jobs good for the teenagers because they consider it as an unnecessary burden on them and these jobs divert the teenager’s focus from academics to work. For instance, it has been observed over the years that countries which do not promote part time jobs have much less school or college dropout ratio among teenage students than the nations which support the idea.
To conclude, there are many valid arguments in favour of both ideas but it is my strong conviction that part time job is necessary for the overall development of a teenager’s personality and nations should promote the concept of part time jobs in order to have more efficient and able workforce.
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The concept of part-time job for young generation is supported by many people worldwide however, there are exceptions where it is discouraged by some. In my point of view doing part-time job can be beneficial for individuals in future.
On the one hand, there are several countries which admire the students to pursue part-time jobs along with their studies. The job can be helpful is various ways, firstly, it lets new people acquire experience which can get them better full-time jobs in future after completion of their studies. Since, many reputable companies prefer experienced people over inexperienced ones. Secondly, the job provides a source of income to many foreigner students who cannot bear their expenses otherwise, do job to support their studies and living in the different countries.
On the other hand, there are some people worldwide who strongly dislike the idea of doing any kind of part-time job during university studies. The main concern of such people is that the university education is difficult as students are occupied with different course assignments, quizzes and term projects. Mostly, undergrad students become victim of depression as there are strict deadlines to follow and a lot of work to complete. In such a situation where students are already under pressure of studies, the part-time job can only increase the tension among them and can affect their studies negatively. It can distract them from studies and can cause them to fail in their own examinations.
To conclude the both views have their own pros and cons. The first one lets young people explore professional life along with financial incentives, where as the second one restricts them to give undivided attention to studies only. In my opinion, part-time job should be done if one has necessity or one is capable to balance the studies and job requirements in parallel.
This seems band 6.5 to me. Your choice of words has to improve. Grammar is another area to focus on.